What does it mean to be a father? What does it mean to be a good father, or a Godly father? Parents too often under estimate, and over estimate, the importance the role a father has when it comes to bringing up their kids. We too often under estimate just how important a father is in producing healthy offspring.
What is a father? I would say that a father is a man who will raise, nurture, and/or cultivate what his seed has produced. A father is not just a seed planter any more than a guy who buries a corn kernel in the ground and then leaves it unattended is a farmer. A squirrel that buries an acorn in the ground isn’t a farmer. Anyone can bury a seed in the ground, and produce offspring. A guy might say, “My seed produced that child.” Well, congratulations, but did it produce a father to raise the child? A father, like a farmer, cares for what his seed has produced – that’s a father.
What is a good father? A good father is someone who cares and tends to the needs of what his seed has produced. This can be done in a poor, average, or above average way. Whether it’s a father or a farmer, he still cares for that product whether it be corn or a child. Some farmers are better and more efficient than other farmers, the same goes with fathers. A good father may spend time with his kids; providing for their needs; teaching them about career options; encouraging them; loving them as best as carnal man can love – even teaching them the virtues of honesty and hard work. Where do these noble and virtuous attributes come from? Is there any spiritual power to adhere to these principles?
Without an understanding of where these virtuous principles come from, as well as an acceptance of and a surrendering to the Author of these principles; through Christ, that father-child relationship is only as good as their last heartbeat! — Jesus said, “What does it profit a man to gain the whole world and lose his own soul?” Without scripture as his guide, a good father’s child has no intrinsic spiritual understanding of a heaven to gain or a hell to fear.
Now, can you be a good father without being a Godly father? I would answer that by asking if eternity should be figured into the equation. Dad, how important is your child’s eternal well-being to you? If it is, (and we know it must be) then; as God defines a good father, I don’t see how you can be a good father without being a Godly father.
But, the good news is that if a Christian father will adhere to the principles of fatherhood laid out in scripture, his chances of experiencing the Kingdom of God with his kids in the here and now are much more likely to be an added bonus to the Kingdom of God he can expect to share with his children in the there and then (eternity). He’s more likely to have his cake and eat it too, so to speak.
I’ve seen it done the culture’s way yielding cultural results. And I’ve seen it done God’s way yielding Godly results. And to be fair, I’ve seen the opposite, but it is the vast exception to the rule. Having a competent, God fearing father in the picture is the optimum, or ideal, model for raising emotionally, behaviorally, psychologically, socially, and spiritually healthy children.
There are a lot of single moms in society today. Studies show that a single parent doing things God’s way is actually a better situation for a child than if both parents are in the picture operating out of dysfunction! Being the director of a residential program for troubled teens, it has been my observation that there is one common denominator with virtually every kid that is enrolled. The denominator equates to an absent, weak, or ungodly father in that child’s life. Troubled teens have this in common. This is also true for prison inmates as well. This ought to tell us a little something about the importance of fathers.
What do you fear most – God, or the culture? Are you going to parent your child as God has ordained? Or, are you going to allow cultural influences—regardless of their anti-biblical precedents and worldview— dictate the way you do this thing called parenting?
Author: Trace Embry is the Founder of Shepherd’s Hill Ministries. He hosts the License To Parent radio program. For over a decade, Shepherd’s Hill Ministries has helped struggling teens through its residential program and Christian boarding school, Shepherd’s Hill Academy located on an 86-acre property in Georgia. Call 706-779-5766 for more information, or join us on Facebook.
