When it comes to parenting, discipline and spanking quickly spark controversy. The results of no discipline within the home is due to permissive parenting and fear.
In today’s post, we tackle the tough topic of discipline and spanking.
Spanking is a Bad Word
Today’s culture tends to present extreme opposition on the topic of discipline.
To even try to defend spanking as a legitimate option in the parenting experience is to look like an abusive Neanderthal in the eyes of the self-proclaimed intelligentsia of the world.
Progressive Non-Thinking Produces Permissive Parenting
The problem is not their “progressive” thinking.
Jesus would have been considered a progressive thinker in His day. The parenting problem is in their progressive way of non-thinking.
Is it not hypocritical to refer to loving parents and care givers as abusers all while claiming to be tolerant of other ideologies and practices that have track records of being a real problem to a kid’s long term well being, such as the permissive (Dr. Spock) style of parenting?
With no heaven to gain and no hell to fear, there is no reason not to tolerate everything from everyone. I have actually talked to people (I kid you not) who have said that they couldn’t condemn Hitler for doing wrong because he was doing what he “believed” to be right.
Interestingly enough, the same people will say that a parent is absolutely wrong for exercising spanking as a legitimate form of discipline.
America never had to deal with this in past generations. Today, it’s one big sin-athon; and, in the eyes of the kids, nobody seems to care enough to give and enforce boundaries that their spirits are crying out for. This leaves our kids feeling abandoned and a need to fend for themselves.
There are terms associated with discipline which should ultimately be considered good things, i.e., like a root canal or heart surgery; on the surface, have negative connotations in the eyes of many people, but in most cases can have positive results.
Some of the terms that can be legitimately associated with discipline and spanking are persuasion, pain, coercion, submission, and force.
I think there is a valid argument to be made that terms like discipline, persuasion, pain, coercion, submission, and force; like intolerance, are usually considered as negative connotations in today’s culture—especially when it is used in terms of child-rearing.
These very same terms can be applied, just as legitimately, to government, sports, diet, exercise, business, education, heart surgery, root canal, police work—just to name a few. Nobody would put these activities in a negative light.
The Result of Avoiding Your Responsibility to Discipline
Consequently, since nobody is forcing Junior to stop his rebellious behavior, we now have an epidemic of teens who are self-mutilating and involved in gang activity.
We have this because built into the fabric of every human being is the need and desire for justice—a justice that is not taking place much anymore.
In most cases, an adult cannot morally or legally force another independent adult to do anything. But, this isn’t true in the case of a kid. He’s a kid—an individual who isn’t fully developed intellectually or emotionally—an individual who even the state defines as a dependent.
Can discipline from a loving parent that is “forced” or imposed upon a rebellious, out-of-control teen possibly be more abusive than the gang activity and self-mutilation and self-destructive behavior that so many American kids are experiencing today?
They are experiencing this “self-abuse” precisely because nobody in authority is “forcing” them to behave—the exact thing their inner being (spirit) is craving.
To help you better understand how to discipline in your home, you can check out our Boundary Development Index.
Conversation Starter: What are your thoughts on the parents who are being responsible and disciplining their children?